My Uterus & Jill Scott on Marriage

Well...so my mini-hiatus is over, I'm back to continue sharing my thoughts with you. First let me tell you what I've been up to:

Today, I was reading Necole Bitchie, where she had a very insightful comment from Jill Scott's take on marriage & relationships. Jill Scott recently broke off her 2-year engagement with her fiancé and baby-daddy.

She tells Vibe:

"I don’t think I’ll get married again. I’m not looking for it. What I can say about my divorce and my failed engagement is that I learned where my bar is. I used to pray for a man who had potential, but that’s not my prayer anymore. Not only does he have to have potential, he has to have had accomplished some things in his life. He has to have a work ethic, because I don’t want to come home to someone sitting on the sofa playing PlayStation. I’m looking for someone who works as hard as I do. Who loves their work as much as I do, so at the end of the night we have something real to talk about, something exciting that makes our blood flow and boil. I need my man to be my homie. If you can’t help me grow, there’s no point with you being in my life."

This babe is making too much sense abeg. I mean honestly, I know I'll be a good catch to any deserving man as per wife matters. But I don't just want to be with someone just because I'm good for them. I want them also to be good for me. Do you feel me? It's not a enough that I should be supportive, caring, and warm to a man. He has to be all those things to me as well. 

Last week, I had a bad case of migraines. I dunno what triggered them but it was followed by my Uterus deciding to fall out! Yes...Aunt Flo thought it'll be a cool idea to visit during my busiest week of the year! I had to mark exams, finish 3 chapters of my dissertation, and still go about like the world was a happy place. I was completely unimpressed with the moon and all things monthly

Speaking of periods, has anyone tried the DIVA/MOON cup? It's that conical cup made from silicone which you insert into your vagina to collect your Uterus chunks (menstruation - this word is so un-sexy!). I hear the diva cup is very earth-friendly (green) and cost-effective. Can you imagine all the money I'd be saving instead of monthly purchases on regular pads, overnight pads, regular tampons, super tampons, panti-liners, and thong-liners! Imagine if all that money was spent treating myself to a spa date once a month or better yet, donating it to a local charity? Hmm... I'm going to look into that Diva Cup business.

 That's the relative size of the cup. It's very bendable since it's made of silicone. The cup is folded vertically and inserted into the vaginal cavity like a tampon.

After insertion into the vagina, apparently you're no longer supposed to feel the cup. After 6-8 hours, the cup should be taken out by the bottom handle and emptied down the toilet drain (eek!). It can be cleansed by rinsing with hot water. And after your period is over, the cup may be sanitized by boiling.

And for all those ladies (& gents) who cringe at the discussion of periods, what is the big deal anyway?! I don't understand the hush-hush taboo around periods as if it's something abnormal. Periods are like the most normal thing about people, just like eating, sleeping, poo-ing, e.t.c

Anyway, those have been the kinda things on my mind this week. I'm looking into seriously pursuing a new hobby; maybe photography or cooking. I'm not sure yet but summer's coming and I cannot be idle! Any ideas for fun hobbies?

Men, Nigerians & Nigerian Politics,

This weekend has been mental. My thoughts have been busy like a beehive. I've got too much to talk about but I'll just leave you some snippets of what's been going on in my head recently.

1. On the last week outburst in Jos, Nigeria  & Nigerian partisan politics in general -
Gywnne Dyer encapsulates my anguish here. He said:

"The northern elite plays the Muslim card repeatedly to preserve its monopoly of power in the northern states, but it will never stop collaborating with the southern elite to maintain the status quo, because all the oil is in the south. The two groups compete fiercely over the division of the spoils, but if the north ever really seceded from Nigeria, the northern elite would lose its access to the oil revenues that keep it rich."

Nigeria is a strange country, no doubt. A country that poses as one of the most religious, yet ranks amongst the most corrupt nations in the world. That is strange.


2. On the 'Enough is Enough' protest coming up next week in Abuja -

I am highly concerned about the security and safety of this march. I pray it will be peaceful. But participants please be vigilant of your surroundings because you never know which thugs have been hired to turn this thing into a mess.

If I would design a revolution in my Country, it will be one of 'FULL DISCLOSURE'. This matter of an absent President is shrouded in too much mystery. As in, c'mon! It's only in Nigeria where the president will be missing for 3 months and nobody still knows what has happened to him. I am not asking that he should be impeached or resign, all I want is full disclosure. Abeg, show ya face; make ya country people know wetin dey worry you so we fit target our prayers! And if the Acting President has truly been conferred 'acting' powers, please let him ACT now & ACT fast!

3. Nigeria doesn't need much to take-off. Nigerians are known to be highly resilient, adaptable, and incredibly ingenious. Give Nigerians the basics and they will function. I'm talking about simple things like infrastructure:

a. Clean Water
b. Electricity
c. Affordable access to health services
d. Good roads
e. Good Airports
f. Hygienic sewage system

And then, let Nigerians enjoy a Good Education and see what they will do! Not the type of education that is fraught with exam malpractices or university strikes. Or the type that is spewing out half-baked graduates. No. I'm talking about the kind of education where a Nigerian girl or boy can dream about a future becoming something unconventional like an Artist or a Sculptor or a Librarian without fears of a life in poverty, or of hopes lost and dreams deferred.

Nigerians deserve the best. They have put in blood, sweat, and tears. Too many Sons and Daughters of this earth have been sacrificed for the dream. Too many people have been complicit in the raping of that Nation. When will it stop? Nigerians deserve better...

4. I'm tired of being single. I need a romantic outlet. I've technically been single for almost 9 months now (aside from one long romance). It's no longer cute. I'm looking for a nice young man, who is creative, intelligent, attractive, and ambitious. I'm not asking for much. I just want someone who gets me. So nice gentlemen in the Greater Toronto Area (GTA) (and environs), please do not hesitate to apply.
 
N.B: He should also be a growing Christian, non-neurotic, doesn't abuse drugs, strong self-esteem, willing to learn, non-flirt, non-player, have a job or at least be in graduate school, have a valid driver's license, must like long walks on the beach, must like dogs, must like books (non-academic literature), must be willing to grow, must be a closet metrosexual (I'm not into scruffy men or the scruffy look), must wear deodorant and cologne, must be passionate about something, must have drive, must be sensual, must have drive, may be any race, colour or size but preference will be awarded to tall, dark, and handsome, bilingual is an asset, must be pro-life, must believe in true love, be caring, kind, compassionate, and must have been born MALE.

Yeah, so these have been a few of my thoughts over the weekend. I'm hopeful for the new week that I will be productive and energized for my trip to New York at the end of the month! So my dear blogville folk, have a blessed weekend!

Kisses,

Anya xoxo


Photo Credit: 
1. Independence day, 2009. European Pressphoto Agency.
2. Child crying after receiving Polio vaccine, REUTERS.
3. Idris Elba, BET. 

Nigeria: Enough is Enough

"I like to make myself believe that Planet Earth turns slowly..."
-Owl City (Fireflies)

That the earth would turn slowly so that Nigeria can become great again. 

....that the earth would turn slowly so that my Country will rise higher than former glory

....that its Citizens would reject complacency and demand Change.

....that the Wind of Change will not pass us by too quickly.

....that the World would wait for us to catch up.

....that her illustrious Sons & Daughters will get a chance to fulfill their destinies.

....that we can forge a stronger sense of national pride.

....that GLORY will rest within the boundaries of our polity

....that fear of tyranny will not haunt our collective subconscious.

....that we learn to live again like there is value in human life

....that the earth would turn slowly & wait for us...

But Planet Earth will NOT wait.

*A laudable attempt at something quasi-revolutionary, however; under-ambitious.

The end of Privacy (formspring.me)

What would you like to know about me? Ask me anything on my formspring page. This is going to be fun, I can tell. So ask away Blogville!

-A.P