Friday, February 26, 2010

The Woman & Wife

I feel a strong sense of push-pull tension about the idea of marriage. As a woman, I look forward to it but quite frankly, I'm also very scared about being married. On the one hand, I imagine the experience of wonderful marital bliss with a Significant Other; a lifetime of togetherness; intimacy; bonding;  raw sex; raising a family; walking the life path... And on the other, inevitable disappointments; heartbreak; dependence; raising a family; walking the life path... Basically, almost the same things which pull me toward the idea, push me away from it!

The Greeks' basically proprietary attitude towards women is well illustrated by the following statement from Demosthenes' account of the lawsuit, Against Naera:

For this is what living with a woman as one's wife means - to have children by her and to introduce the sons to the members of the clan and of the deme, and to betroth the daughters to husbands as one's own. Mistresses we keep for the sake of pleasure, concubines for the daily care of our persons, but wives to bear us legitimate children and to be faithful guardians of our households.

Since the time of the ancient Greeks, what has really changed in our modern society? These days, people rave about how women have achieved equality & liberty; yet many wives are still simply being relegated to the background as 'bearers of legitimate children'.

When I think about the relationship between husbands and wives, I imagine a union where individuals are day-to-day companions, of emotional & intellectual intimates. But obviously, this has not always been the case with traditional roles for men and women in matrimony.

When you think about marriage, how would you describe the role & relationship of the woman & wife to her man & husband?


Friday, February 19, 2010

Stupid Young (White) People

As a Grad Student, I have the opportunity of being a Teaching Assistant; hosting seminars, grading exams, etc; in Political Science, Gender Studies, and Human Rights courses. I get the chance to question intelligence and knowledge on a weekly basis.

So I'm marking the midterm for one Gender course and this is what one student wrote about the "Male Gaze" - pay attention to the example he uses to explain the concept:

"The Male gaze refers to a certain perspective of looking at something. An example of this is that an Orthodox Jew would look at a piece of holocaust memorabilia more intently and from a different perspective than would a South African who knows very little about world history"

To which I remarked - "...outrageous claim! See me in my office."

Sometimes I just wonder where these kids get their ideas from. You don't have to be South African to get offended by that one!

Or check out the introductory paragraph in one essay about development aid to Africa from my 3rd level Political Science course:

"The country of Africa is afflicted with many woes..."

To which I remarked - "...when last did you visit the said 'country'?"

And this student threw in a lot of "...those people" into the soup to enrich the broth. As in "...those people are desperately hungry and will die unless they are fed", or "...those people must accept help from anywhere they can get it". Arrgghhh....

Why do some young people think it's OK to be foolish? And especially when your T.A is a very conspicuous black African female?!

-Anya (weary from marking)
-Listening to country music all night long :)
-Now playing: Anne Murray 'Danny's Song'

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Renewed Faith: That's My King

That's My King from Dustin Bankord. You can check out more videos from the list here

I hope you're having a great week everyone, mine is very busy as usual but it's good. We're making progress.

Anya xo

Monday, February 1, 2010

Obesity is a Sin

Obesity is a sin. It's up there with Murder, Adultery, and Covetousness.*

Introducing, Anya's Law

Gluttony is a sin. Greed is a sin.


Gluttony + Greed + uninhibited propensity to indulge =  Obesity :. Sin

Why are some people obese? How did they eat their way to that weight? Are they naturally hungrier than other people? Are they just greedy? Are some people more susceptible to weight gain than others?
I have a genuine fear of being fat. It is the fear that I will eat myself to death. That I will become so big and swollen that I will no longer be considered attractive by the opposite sex. I feel good about myself when I think I'm attractive but I feel even better when others think I am an attractive person.

I'm afraid of fat people. I think that fat is contagious. Sometimes, I feel that if I hang around a fat person, my body may sub-consciously tap into their frequency of fatness; that I'll start eating like them, I'll become allergic to exercise, and swell into a shapeless blob of fat globules.

I think I'd rather have an eating disorder (like anorexia or bulimia) than be Obese.  
There's nothing sexy about obesity.
 At least with anorexia, I can gradually eat my way back to my ideal weight (125 lbs). But it'll take a lot of hard work & determination to burn  200lbs down to 125.

 When I start having kids, I intend to work out like a fiend right after each birth. Fat is not sexy - even on moms. I'll exercise post-baby so it won't be said that "oh, she let herself go after having children". That will not be said about me. No. Never.

There are so many stereotypes about fat people; that they're dirty. they're stinky. they have low self-esteem. they're weak. they have no will to lose weight. e.t.c. How can you possibly (un)believe these stereotypes when you see this?

So my dear readers, are you fat? More so, are you obese? What are you doing about your predicament?
These days I have 138 lbs on my 5'5" frame. But I'm working hard everyday to redeem myself from the bondage of sin.

Never be afraid to take charge of your body. It's the only one you've got!

 Anya Posh


*: (Anya's Bible, Revised edition 2010).


1. This entry is not intended to offend anyone who considers him/herself obese. But if you are offended, start fasting (on fruit).

2. Or please check out:  Weight Watchers, Billy Blanks Tae Bo, HIIT,