Sunday, March 22, 2009

Ink-BLOT...my subconscious rant


Did you ever take an ink-blot test? I took one a few years ago & it was pretty intense. I discovered that my subconscious is tuned into sexual thoughts of gratification. For example, sometimes when I think about something, it can automatically take on a sexual innuendo. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this tendency. There are a lot of people who think about sexual thoughts like me all the time. We are not that rare...but we are sacred. Yes, I said it...extraordinary people.

I'm really just bored and horny. Haven't got any in about 6 months. Body no be wood. Broke up with the X-Boy, trying to move on to other things, I can't be bothered. Today im fantasizing that i'm going to get some from him. Why? because I can. The p3nis was so good, I would sell my entire shoe collection to own it. And I have a lot of shoes.
You say not a reasonable offer? Ok, I'll sell my laptop too just to get it.
Still not good enough? frig, I'll even sell my roommate for a year's supply of d!ck. Kai and I love my roommate... :(
One thing I won't sell though is my soul. D!ck is not worth my precious soul.

X-Boy has said if I want his penis that badly, then we have to get back together. He says he misses me terribly and that he doesn't think there's anyone out there for him like me. I'm flattered but hell no.
We had too many complications in our history. 1st of all, his randy ass wasn't ready to get serious when I was with him. And I wasn't even asking for a diamond key to unlock my heart. I just wanted us to be in a committed & exclusive relationship. Is that too much to ask? I seriously doubt it.
It was a long-distance situation so he wanted to fuck around, y'know; get as much tail as he could with the ladies. But alas! homeboy has gotten with the program. Now he wants to own my uterus. Fuck that! I'm not about to surrender my vulva to anyone just yet. Just because you've had your fill of fornication doesn't mean i'd be waiting for you to come & rescue me. Why do some guys think that their love is worth a Universe? I mean seriously...i don't want you no more. I'd rather play by myself than think about ever shagging up with you again.

Anyhow...I'm ranting. And like I said, body no be wood. Plus being bored & horny doesn't help either. And I can't shag up with any random...there has to (or have been) some kinda affection there, y'know. I dunno how other people do it but one-night stands are definitely not my thing.
So yes, even after all my ranting I think I'm just going to get it from the X-Boy. yes, you heard me right. I have been d!ckmatized & I liked it.

P.S: I know my first paragraph & picture have absolutely nothing to do with this rant. But I don't care. I digress all the time. Tangents are my thing. Call me Anya-Tangentsia or Tangy-Anya... Anya & her ramblings... rants & raves by her royal highness: Anya Posh IV. Oh shit, i'm doing it again. Urrghh whatev.. have a good weekend, my fellow d!ck lovers!

P.P.S: This post is completely unlike me. I'll probably delete it very soon. I think I was under the influence of Ogbanje/Stress when I wrote this last night. But then I posted it anyway. What is wrong with me? HAHAHAHA!!!

P.P.P.S: And so the post stays up!

28 comments:

Sexkitten said...

Nothing is wrong with you. This is great. I absolutely enjoy it.

bob-ij said...

Very funny!..Goodluck with dealing with this....ummm I dunno!

x!

MissLove said...

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! lol!!! this post has A WHOLE LOT TO DO WITH ALMOST ALL MY FRIENDS NOW!!! what is really going on I am really concerned oh! I feel you on the one-night stand ish... like seriously I can't! and girls are scaring me now adays oh lol this horniness aint even EZ! lol!!! the ex story *sighs* most of my friends are dicmatized as well... its hard to let go especially when you know your body has been tuned to only that station! can't imagine being with a new person oh if my man should just drop my ass... kai... *singing Beyonce's broken-hearted gurl*

RocNaija said...

lol..

new one for wikipedia.. dickmatized..

So is this how a woman feels then..

*Walks away thinking..*

"no wonder she's been calling me"

Confessions of a London gal said...

5Th... Lemme go read!

Confessions of a London gal said...

A woman's got to do wat a woman's got to do!
It feels right, you do it!

Temite said...

Go and gerrit o jare. More grease to your elbow...or other places. ewwwwwwwwww I think I just disgusted myself. Have fun dear!

Buttercup said...

lol @ u selling ur roommate..haha

i hope u find a solution to this situation soon!

lol @ temite..

Fashinga said...

Lol@ Rocnaija...you're just a clown..

Meanwhile, LOL!!!!! @ your post...Be dickmatized all u want but please dont get it from X-man...I think he's Dick-notized u...you need to break free from the spell and i'm here to help u..No homo...lol!!!!!!!!

Love your blog...

Later Babes!!!
F.

flabby said...

lol!jokes!

Afrobabe said...

Hahahhahaah...I knew there was something sacred about me...now I know...

Jayla. said...

yes o, here is to us 'SACRED' people. U can get it with X-man, who says women can't use men for sex?

O'Dee said...

lol at you being under the infulence of ogbaje's. You are just horny.

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

LMAO!!! Loving this post *smile*.

wordmerchant said...

heheheheh....very funny lol@digmatized

I am horny bored and have too much time on my hands. Devils playground :)

Bibi said...

i agree with you jare. we are extraordinary pple. it's very healthy to think about sex. i mean, why not? it makes it better during sex. anyways, get with xman if you love his carrot that bad. just make sure he's STD free. i don't trust these guys o!. lol

Writefreak said...

Hmmm...i hope whatever spirit possessed you to write this post, like you said has left you...lol

Original Mgbeke said...

My dear, Agro na real bish! Have you ever heard of Okafor's law? The one about if a man does you right, he will always have access to do you right or something? Aniwoos X-man sounds like a Mr. Okafor. :-D
I aint mad atcha, get some so we can live vicariously through you. Or maybe you should invest in a jumpoff around your hood.

Lolia said...

omg so lol @ Temite saying '..or other places...ewwww I think I just disgusted myself' and @ O'Dee and 'You are just horny'

Blogger is priceless!

Don't delete the post jo...Express yourself even if it's a new side of yourself lol

meanwhile my new url is

http://theartofrememory.blogspot.com :)

Blanche Truffle said...

Hahaha! Somebody needs a little something...Get it oh!...Or eles you'll be frustrated with everyone else!...lol

Parakeet said...

You know I was reading this and wondering did AnyaPosh actually write this. But eh shows we're human. Abt Xman fucking around, I could never understand men when it comes to that. Scout around and u'll sure get a better dick.

You've been given the honest scrap award so check my blog for details.
Cheers me dears.

Chari said...

looooool...d!ctmatized! now that is priceless...are u sure you can take this dive in the pool without getting wet? [oops no pun intended]

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

BTW, I gave you an award on my blog.

Tininu said...

all i can say to this post is sssssseeeeeeeeennnnnnnn!!! as i am speechless

Tha BossMack TopSoil said...

Lol, I love your realness.

MissLove said...

OH I FEEL HONOURED HEHEHE N I SHALL BRAG... so sleepy just stopped by would read, comment and then write mine!!!

Bevie said...

I have taken an ink-blot test. A long time ago. I also saw more than a few sexual things in the pictures. Like the one you've posted. But there are other things, too.

"I'm really just bored and horny."

Love the way you put things! I understand completely. I don't get a lot either.

Good luck to you.

Wonderfully & Beautifully...MADE said...

hahaha....nice post.love your blog..very honest....then again a lot of people feel the same way you do but just do not have the balls to put it up for the whole world..ermmm..like me...ahem*..hmmm..we should be friends..i like you already, and i do not know you..thats a good thing aye??..xxx